Yesterday morning the hubby deployed. I’m one of the lucky ones because he is only gone for 4 months instead of 6, 12, or 15 months. Nonetheless, it was and will continue to be difficult to see him leave.
When we woke up, I decided to make him his favorite pancakes before he left. These are the fluffiest pancakes ever because the egg whites are whipped, then folded in. It’s like eating clouds!
Please excuse the pic, I’m getting a new camera soon since mine has apparently given up…
Preheat griddle to 350 degrees F or a pan on med-low to med heat.
In a large bowl, combine flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt.
In a small bowl, combine milk, egg yolks, and 2 tablespoons melted butter; add to flour mixture, whisking until smooth.
In a small bowl, beat egg whites at medium-high speed with an electric mixer until stiff. Gently fold into batter. Gently fold in blueberries.
Spray nonstick cooking spray in pan or on griddle. Ladle about 1/4-cup batter for each pancake onto hot griddle or pan. Cook pancakes for 2 to 3 minutes, or until tops are covered with bubbles and edges look cooked. Turn and cook the other side. Serve with more butter and real maple syrup.
After Steve finished packing after breakfast, I drove him to base. I helped him get his luggage out of the truck, and we hugged for a few minutes while I fought holding tears back. I seriously hate crying especially in situations like this because I don’t want him to feel bad. It’s bad enough that he knows that he has to leave me for a while. My swollen wet eyes and snot dripping out of my nose, I’m sure, don’t make it any better. A tear or two did manage to sneak their way out of my tear ducts though. We said our “I love you’s,” kissed and held each other a little more, and he was off.
The thing is, I’m not mad or upset at anyone for this situation. My husband LOVES his job, and he wants to be deployed. He wants to utilize the skills he has learned. He never complains about his job. He is proud to serve his country. I’m proud to serve my country by supporting him in anyway I can. Seriously, it’s the least that I can do. I have been all over the world, and it honestly makes me so thankful that I am an American citizen. Most American citizens have no clue how lucky they are. They are spoiled, materialistic, and think they “deserve” things without any hard work. Steve and I have been together for 5 and a half years, and it has taught me that love and friendship are the only “real” things in life. Traveling has only made that more apparent.
When I tell people that Steve leaves as often as he does (our last year in the states, he was gone 280 days) or as long as he does, they say, “Oh, I couldn’t do that! I feel so sorry for you!”. I know this is meant to be a compliment meaning that I’m very strong for dealing with this life that I have being married to a person in the military. I laugh it off, but inside I’m a little irritated. If you really truly loved someone, YOU WOULD deal with it. TRUST ME. YOU WOULD. And, I don’t feel sorry for myself, why should you? I’m not going to lie, and tell you it’s easy. It’s not. I don’t imagine that it will get any easier when we have kids either. I spent the night at a friend’s house last night so I wouldn’t have to spend the first night alone in my house, and I did cry a few times yesterday. I’m sure that there will be a few more crying episodes in the future, but nothing worth having is ever easy.
Steve and I trust each other, and that helps a lot in situations like these. To me, there is no other man that comes close to comparing with him, and he thinks the same way about me. We are honest with each other about everything. He also knows that I am independent enough that he doesn’t have to worry about the car breaking down or something like that happening while he is gone. Shit happens (literally and figuratively), and I will deal with it if and when it does. Thinking about what happened during the last deployment when everything in our house decided to break or blow up or the septic tank backing up into the house through the bathtubs (that was fun, let me tell you), it will probably be a question of when rather than if.
If we were co-dependent on each other (or if even one was on the other), our marriage wouldn’t work. I have met some military spouses that are so dependent on their significant others for happiness, and this often leads to divorce. I make it a point to be happy everyday or at least have something to laugh about everyday. Even though I cried a few times yesterday, I still laughed with my friends last night. I’m a happy person because I choose to be, not only because I’m married to someone. Although, my hubby does make me happy. 😉
Well, that is it for now. I was really hesitant about posting this, but I had to get it off my chest…
I decided to skip spin for today simply b/c I don’t feel like it, and I am off to yoga now. Maybe I’ll go for a run later. Regularly scheduled workouts will resume tomorrow…